"The waiting is the hardest part."
Sigh. I'm not a patient waiter. Who is, really? I'm--we're--waiting to hear back about Beast's graduate school application. His top pick is a school in California. California. As in, sunny and warm and more laidback. California, as in, the complete oppposite side of the country, one of the few states I have never visited and one of the states I'm constantly told I "belong" in (although Momma Val disagrees and thinks I'm more of a Washington or Idaho girl). Perhaps most importantly, California is where I do not have a job.
My feelings are mixed. On one hand, I'm not a huge Boston fan. I don't know, it could be something about the lack of community and abundance of selfish, cold, self-involved people combined with sky-high rental rates and bone-chilling, wet winters. I don't want Bean growing up to invest so little in others, which is the example set by the majority of folks around here. California has year-round farmers markets, great weather, an ocean you can actually swim in, a more progressive community. California is an unknown that I can discover and relish in. Beast would love grad school.
On the other hand, I have a job at a nonprofit with great benefits here that I can work from home for half the week. This isn't exactly the best time to go job hunting. I'm tired of Beast being in school. We have been together for nearly a decade, and for nearly a decade minus one year, one or the other of us has been in school. It would be nice to actually see each other instead of do homework a few nights a week. California is expensive, just as much if not moreso than Boston. Having been here two years now, I feel like we're just getting settled. I'm tired of moving. I've moved more than a dozen times in the last decade. Moving means I'd have to pack again. I hate packing. Don't they have earthquakes and mountain lions in California?
So, I wait.
"They say fate, it takes time. I walk a thin line."
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9 comments:
Wow, that must be driving you nuts. It would me. Our cousins and grandma lived in San Diego and the whole time I was growing up we would go visit every few years. It was OK to visit but you wouldn't want to live there. Berkeley is much further north. Where we went there was no dirt, lizards everywhere, tons of buses and many people didn't wear much of anything. I think Northern California is a different story. Have you ever considered Illinois? Just a thought. Maybe closer to me? lol Sorry for my selfishness. I see you in Colorado or Oregon or somewhere like that, though I've never been to Berkeley, California. Maybe that is one of the best places to live. You should check out my blog pal A Sense Of Humor Is Essential. She is from California, can't remember where, sorry :( My vote is for Illinois!!!
Oh, and the job thing I would also be terrified. Sounds like you have worked very hard to get a perfect arrangement for Bean. Never know what else is out there. I am not a mover either. We want to move out of this place BUT I like to plant my roots and stay in one spot at least for several years between moves.
Never having met you in person, but only having followed your blog for, say, two years, I have to agree with Momma Val. Washington definitely. Idaho maybe, more likely Oregon. Idaho is a strange mix of old hippies drifting across from Washington, Mormons, and Militia.
I remember going through this with my ex, as eahch of us aplied to grad school. I hate waiting, too, but I suspect that ultimately how ever it goes it will be okay.
Yes, earthquakes and not really mountain lions. At least none to worry about. We don't worry overmuch about the earthquakes here either. CA is great and would love to have you in my state. The good - the weather, the farmers markets, the culture, the weather, and did I mention the weather. The bad - it is SUPER expensive, the state has no money, our schools are on the verge of bankruptcy. But then, there's the weather. And the growing seasons. As so we all suck it up.
Good luck.
Best of luck!
If I may, as a So Cal resident, you'll love it here. The weather is great, the earthquakes are few and the people (for the most part) are friendly. The job market is a little tough but the stimulus package is going to open up more opportunities out here soon.
BTW- great schools out here as well.
I have only travelled to California once, flying into San Francisco, then driving up the coast to Humboldt County to see the redwoods. I found northern California to be spectacularly beautiful, but wondered how people could support themselves there. I found the traffic in the Bay area to be unbearable -- hopefully there will be good public transport where you may end up.
I know whatever happens, you will make the best of it. Moving is never fun, and seems especially intimidating in these economic times. But I really can see you having a ton of fun exploring your new environment.
What a crazy decision to have to make. The only advice I can give you is that, if you move, you should try to find a job before relocating.
My aunt and uncle made the mistake of moving to Humid State before securing employment, and boy are they feeling it now.
Are you originally from Massachusetts?
I think a person like you would really enjoy California. I went out there for the first time last summer, and I don't think I met one mean individual the entire time I was there.
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